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Mexican Culture: The Funeral of Don Cleto
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
We got the phone call yesterday. It wasn’t exactly unexpected. Don
Cleto had passed away.
Anacleto Salcedo Rordriguez was
Omar’s grandfather. We always said that Omar was lucky, at 28, to have
three living grandparents. We were all lucky to have known Don Cleto.
He was born and spent his childhood
in a cave in the Mexican state of Zacatecas. One of his earliest memories was
of the Revolutionary soldiers passing through. In those lawless days the soldiers
took from the people whatever they needed to go on—food, clothes, women. Don
Cleto’s parents were fortunate. The army took only food and clothing.
As a young adult, Anacleto started
a family—and didn’t stop until they numbered ten children. Soon after,
his wife died—whether from disease or exhaustion, we don’t know.
Omar’s father fell somewhere
in the middle, age-wise. By the time he was eight, he was selling eggs door-to-door,
barefoot.
Don Cleto raised his family to
be close and strong. When he became ill with diabetes in recent years, his children
and grandchildren filled his house, as they always had, and gave him constant care.
Don Cleto never complained when
he lost first one leg and then the other to his disease. But he couldn’t
understand why God took two of his children, Mago and Javier, before him.
Lately Anacleto hadn’t been
able to keep down food, and was sinking into dementia. Yesterday at 9 in the
morning, entering his bedroom with a glass of water and to help him turn, Carmela and Lipa found he had died a few minutes
before before.
Don Cleto lived his life
in austere conditions. He could never provide his family with material goods. But his house was central in the lives of his ten children, and later their spouses
and the grandchildren, so many it’s impossible to keep them straight.
That’s where the
love was.
Mexican Funerals
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
With the death of Omar’s
grandfather yesterday, it seems like a good time to talk about Mexican funerals. Of
course, details will differ from family to family and among the social classes, but here is an example of what you might find.
Omar’s family pays a monthly
fee on a funeral package, so everything is covered when the service is needed.
The funeral home itself is quite
swank, with lots of carved wood, two story statues of the saints, and an outside terrace with a gardened waterfall. Fruit juices, coffee, and tea are available. There is a small
viewing room, and just off that a very small area for the immediate family to compose themselves.
Other funeral homes we have been
to are much more Spartan.
The casket is usually open, but
with a Plexiglas window through which you view the departed.
The family stays at the funeral
home all night, talking and sleeping on chairs and couches. Burial is the following
day, unless people are traveling from far away, when there may be an extra day for viewing.
Flowers are welcome, but
they are not usually found in profusion. White predominates, as do shield-like
circular designs about 3 feet across, with a background of palm fronds and a simple design of white mums, all set up on an
easel.
Older folks usually want
a traditional burial, but the younger generation is more likely to consider cremation.
Dan and Omar
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